Wednesday 31 October 2012
Tuesday 30 October 2012
The shortest horror Story
A woman is sitting alone in a house. She knows she is alone in the whole world; every other living thing is dead. Suddenly there is a knock on the door.
Sunday 28 October 2012
Characters of History and how they saw the World
First came Moses and said: "Everything is law!"
After came Jesus and said: "Everything is love!"
Long time afterwards, Marx pondered over the world and said: "Everything is about money!"
Later, in America, Rockefeller said: "Everything is for selling!"
Meanwhile in the old Europe, a man called Freud, who studies human behavior,claims: "Everything is Sex!"
Fortunately, came Einstein and said: "Everything is relative!"
After came Jesus and said: "Everything is love!"
Long time afterwards, Marx pondered over the world and said: "Everything is about money!"
Later, in America, Rockefeller said: "Everything is for selling!"
Meanwhile in the old Europe, a man called Freud, who studies human behavior,claims: "Everything is Sex!"
Fortunately, came Einstein and said: "Everything is relative!"
Saturday 27 October 2012
Friday 26 October 2012
Thursday 25 October 2012
How to escape the Friendzone
If you are a man, follow carefully these steps:
1. Become her closest friend, do everything for her, confort her in the sad moments, make her laugh, etc.
2. When she considers you her best friend, tell her you want to be more than that.
3. If she says yes, problem solved. If she gives you the friend speech, tell her you can't carry on being just her friend.
4. If she still won't be with you, tell her you can't be her friend anymore, and walk away.
5. Don't speak to her, call her, text her for months. Don't be a pussy and crack, because if you do, you will loose her forever.
But, be carefull, don't be a dick either. If she calls, don't pick up. If she texts, don't reply. If you see her in the street, be polite, act aloof, and make any excuse to leave.
6. Give it a couple of months, and she will miss you so much, she will be itching to have you back.
Most importantly, be a man, nothing is less sexual than a cheese guy.
If you are a woman:
1. Show him your tits. That should be enough.
1. Become her closest friend, do everything for her, confort her in the sad moments, make her laugh, etc.
2. When she considers you her best friend, tell her you want to be more than that.
3. If she says yes, problem solved. If she gives you the friend speech, tell her you can't carry on being just her friend.
4. If she still won't be with you, tell her you can't be her friend anymore, and walk away.
5. Don't speak to her, call her, text her for months. Don't be a pussy and crack, because if you do, you will loose her forever.
But, be carefull, don't be a dick either. If she calls, don't pick up. If she texts, don't reply. If you see her in the street, be polite, act aloof, and make any excuse to leave.
6. Give it a couple of months, and she will miss you so much, she will be itching to have you back.
Most importantly, be a man, nothing is less sexual than a cheese guy.
If you are a woman:
1. Show him your tits. That should be enough.
Wednesday 24 October 2012
Tuesday 23 October 2012
Monday 22 October 2012
I asked Santa
Last year, I asked Santa for the sexiest person ever for Christmas... and I woke up in a box.
Sunday 21 October 2012
Saturday 20 October 2012
Friday 19 October 2012
Long Distance Consequences
If an alien in a galaxy 65 million light years away was looking at us through a powerful telescope right now, he would be looking at dinosaurs.
Thursday 18 October 2012
Wednesday 17 October 2012
First Date
I invited a girl for a drink and then I took her to my house. She told me: "I don't sleep with anybody on the first date." I said: "What about the last one?"
Tuesday 16 October 2012
Monday 15 October 2012
Don't Take it Wrong But...
What you are telling me starts to sound reasonable. Must be time to take my medication.
Sunday 14 October 2012
Saturday 13 October 2012
Friday 12 October 2012
Thursday 11 October 2012
Once you get to Know
I hate when people say "He's a nice person once you get to know him"
As far as I'm concerned, they might as well just say "He's an idiot, but you'll get used to it."
Cages for Babies, London 1937
A long time ago parents were recommended to expose their children to the sun and fresh air. In 1937 Members of the "Chelsea Baby Club" who didn't have a garden were given this cages to fix to their windows and keep there their babies.
Wednesday 10 October 2012
The wise Man and his Joke
A wise man sat in the audience and cracked a joke. Everybody laughs like crazy.
After a moment, he cracked the same joke again. This time less people laughed.
He cracked the same joke over and over, until noboby was laughing anymore. Then he smiled and said:
- You can't laugh at the same joke again and again, but why do you keep crying and complaining over the same thing over and over again?
After a moment, he cracked the same joke again. This time less people laughed.
He cracked the same joke over and over, until noboby was laughing anymore. Then he smiled and said:
- You can't laugh at the same joke again and again, but why do you keep crying and complaining over the same thing over and over again?
Tuesday 9 October 2012
Mind Reading
1. Think of a country beginning with D.
2. Take the second letter of that country and think of an animal.
3. Think of the color of that animal.
......
There are not grey elephants in Denmark.
Monday 8 October 2012
Sunday 7 October 2012
Saturday 6 October 2012
The Heart only Responsability
Your feelings and emotions come from your brain, the heart is just a myogenic muscular organ that is responsible for pumping blood.
Get over it.
Friday 5 October 2012
Thursday 4 October 2012
Wednesday 3 October 2012
Tuesday 2 October 2012
Monday 1 October 2012
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Hilarious underground map. Take your time to see the name of some tube stations. Link: Listo.tumblr
