First Law of Thermodynamics

 When you get a beer from the fridge, put in another one.

 

Time Travel Course

 -Good morning, I come for the time travel course.

-Sorry, it was tomorrow.

-Ok, I will come back yesterday.

Everything that your Wife tells You

 -Do you do everything that your wife tells you?

-No.

-Very good, a man is a man.

-I don't have time to do everything.

Two Types of People, one Shower

 There are two types of people: those who urinate in the shower, and those who say they don't.

 

Leave Place to the Professionals

 

My Son doesn't eat Fish

 -My son doesn't want to eat fish, for what could I replace it?

-For a cat. Cats love fish.

 

If Men are agreeing with You

 

My Husband doesn't talk to Me

 

-My husband doesn't talk to me.

-Have you tried to shut up?

 

To write my Memoirs

-I always wanted to write my memoirs.

-Why you didn't do it?

-Do what?

Dog People Vs Cat People

 

This is my Super-power

 - My super-power is that I don't waste time arguing with idiots.

- That's not a super-power.

- You are right.

Well done Iron Man

 A guy with an Iron Man T-shirt.

The T-shirt is creased.

 

Wrong Moment Time Traveller

 

The Police Man, the Driver and the artificial Parrot

 

Sacred Books

 The Bible and the Quran, both tell us to love each other.

The Kama Sutra is a little more specific.

When your Dreams come True

 

Via @ferdeles

Confession Today

 

The Light at the End of the Tunnel

 At last, we can start to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Hope this is for the best.

Via @MenteObliqua

Counting Sheep

 

In any case It Is

 

Maybe it's not a virus, maybe it's a IQ test.